In six (!) years as a parent, I thought I’d seen everything, no matter how horrific. But, today, for the first time, I saw one of my children vigorously eating pizza and throwing up pizza! Exact same orifice! Exact same time! My mind couldn’t quite absorb what it was seeing. Nicely done, Caitlin. Nothing kills your appetite. I don’t think we’re allowed in that café anymore.
My favorite thing about December is Christmas. But my second favorite thing (sorry Hanukkah!) is the Slate.com “Explainer” contest. Columnist Daniel Engber allows readers to choose one crackpot reader question he never got to during the year. Among my favorite queries this year:
“Is it just me, or do all national anthems the world over, no matter how rich and exotic the culture, seem to sound like European marching-band music? Wouldn’t one expect China’s national anthem be more ‘plinky’? Shouldn’t Iraq’s national anthem sound a little more ‘Arab-y’?”
“Who made up the rule that if you wore a shirt all day, went home, and washed it, you can’t wear it the next day?”
“Burma’s dictator has a chestful of bullshit medals. What’s up with that, Explainer?”
Was anyone watching earlier this week when a Price Is Right contestant guessed his Showcase prize down to the exact dollar? First time it’s happened in thirty years. But watch the clip: host Drew Carey seems shockingly blasé about the whole thing.
Instead of “blasé”, read “passive-agressive.” Internet buzz says that a diehard Price Is Right fan was in the crowd, feeding unusually well-informed prices to the contestants. (Well, more informed than the usual yelling idiots in the show’s crowd, anyway.) And that’s why Drew was pissed. But I guess the contestant says he won fair and square. Way to ruin the big moment, Drew!